A guide to when you are not feeling hot

Photo by Lianelys Cabrera

By Lianelys Cabrera

Countless times I’ve found myself lost in insecurity, comparing my body and face to every person on social media and wondering, why am I not like that? A few months ago, my daily ritual was to take a long shower and listen to Olivia Rodrigo’s “Jealousy, Jealousy” on repeat. Yes, sometimes I would much rather be anyone else, any of those perfect girls with sculptural bodies and smooth-looking skin. I think this feeling is normal, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who falls into this stupid comparison game. I have to confess that, most times, I don’t feel pretty or hot, and I have to force myself to believe that I’m that main character everyone talks about. How can you feel that lust when you can’t even find the desire within yourself? But I’m not here to ruminate about my feelings and insecurities. I’m here to give you a small guide to help you when you’re not feeling like the best version of yourself. I’ll probably, once again, fall into cliche statements, but I don’t care at this point.

  1. Stand in front of the mirror and have a conversation with yourself. You will look crazy, but it’s ok! You’re alone! Make a promise to only engage in positive self-talk. No more wondering why your body looks a certain way or fixating on specific features. 
  2. Play music that makes you feel good. We love Olivia Rodrigo, but her lyrics bring my insecure, depressed teenage self back. Instead, play some SZA, because yes, good days are coming. 
  3. Delete some social media apps from your phone. I know it’s very hard, and trust me, I know how addicting it can be. But, this is something that has worked for me. Staying away from triggers is a great strategy to prevent falling into harmful comparisons. Once you feel better, download the app again. 
  4. Write your feelings. You can even audio record your emotions and everything that goes through your mind. The point is to let everything out. Don’t keep anything inside that can be hurtful to your mind or your heart. 
  5. Explore. Yes, explore what makes you feel better or worse, the things that make you cringe, the ones that make you feel vulnerable like a child, the ones that make you feel sensual. Find out who you are! The magical and fantastical being that you are.    

Note: These are just suggestions, so do what makes you happy 🙂


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